Why mindset matters!

It would start with the familiar churn in my stomach, the redness would spread across my chest and flush up into my face, and would be followed by usual self talk; ‘oh no, i’m so nervous’ ‘what if I drop the ball?’ ‘i bet no-one else is this nervous about going onto the pitch’……I was playing Premiership rugby and, at first, I felt like an imposter. I would work myself up before a match so much so that I would burn so much energy embracing my ‘nerves’ before kick off that I would feel entirely exhausted within the first few minutes.

I would get the same feeling before a presentation at work and would just say to myself ‘I’m just not good at presentations’ or ‘I’m just not cut out for this’. Something had to change, it was hampering my development in so many ways and I was not enjoying myself when I was in a certain kind of situation.

In hindsight, I know that i was fighting against my natural physiological response to a ‘stressful’ situation. A situation which presented some sort of danger. Before a match, it was the possibility of getting physically hurt. Before a presentation, it was the prospect of being humiliated in some professional capacity. I never allowed this to stop me from playing rugby, or from putting myself ‘out of my comfort zone’, but I never enjoyed it. And it certainly held me back from fully ‘showing up’.

When I started my brief stint playing rugby for Scotland, it was during a conversation with one of my coaches that it clicked for me. “but that is your body’s response - it’s getting you ready for the game” and that was it. Ready. It made so much sense. I had been telling myself for years that I was ‘nervous’ - a word with a negative judgement associated to it - and just by switching out that one word for an alternative, and positive word - ‘ready’ - meant it had a huge impact.

This was the first time I had experienced, and learnt from, reframing. For me, I was then able to reframe what I was feeling and telling myself and the outcome and experience was so different. I was walking on to the pitch with the same stomach churning feeling in my gut but I was telling myself an entirely different story ‘Yes, this is it, my body knows, I’m ready for this!’. I changed my story and it changed my game. It changed how I then approached presentations at work, or any scenario where previously I would have shuddered at the thought of putting myself out there or of walking into a potentially ‘dangerous’ scenario.

So it really is about mindset. Its all within your control. If you tell yourself a negative story, you’re going to feel pretty negative about it - but you can change that!

By Michelle Horgan (nee Napier)